Providence of God?

Last night Brother Don Blackwell concluded our gospel meeting at Willow Avenue church of Christ, by speaking on the Providence of God. He talked about how God does things providentially, or allows things to happen to us, or us to be put in situations that open our eyes to the bigger picture. The word "providentially" derives from the root word "providence" which means "view." Sometimes God allows things to happen to us in order to "wake us up" and maybe put us in positions to spread the Gospel. Even before Brother Blackwell preached this sermon last night, I had today specifically picked out to tell my story.

Two years ago this week, on this very Thursday, January 25, 2018, my life changed forever. Before I get to the events of that day, allow me to back up five months earlier to August 2017. One night in early August I began having discomfort in my legs and feet that were eerily similar to seizure activity that I once had when I was in middle school. All the doctors that I went to had no answers. Meanwhile, I didn't sleep for two months or more due to the pain. Each night I would sit on the edge of my bed with my feet in a bedpan and my mom and I would watch Gunsmoke or Perry Mason reruns on TV. The lack of sleep made me irritable throughout the day, and my nightly issues with pain also caused me to miss my best friend's bachelor party. I eventually was able to get some sleep thanks to the assistance of prescription ibuprofen.

One nurse practitioner I saw prescribed me 800mg tablets of ibuprofen that I was to take one half tablet every night before bed. The pills worked, and instead of being up with pain all night, I might be up for a few hours, with a few full nights of sleep mixed in. Pretty soon I began to start having pain in my stomach and abdominal area. I didn't think anything of it, I thought that maybe I had eaten something that didn't agree with me. I probably went two or three months without telling anyone about my new pain issues and as a typical red blooded American male, "I just sucked it up and dealt with the pain."

Fast forward to January 25, 2018. I was driving home when suddenly I felt this excruciating pain in my stomach. I thought "well I guess I ate something." I was only a mile or so away from home so I didn't think it was a big deal. When I got home the pain wouldn't go away like it had for the past few months. It was the worst pain that I have ever experienced. My mom knew something was wrong because she said my body was gray. I also voluntarily agreed to go to the emergency room, something that I have never done. We got over there and it felt like forever until my name was called. By this time I was sitting in the waiting room in the fetal position. I got called back for x-rays and I couldn't even stand straight up to walk. I felt and probably looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame. After a series of tests, the ER doctor came in and said "Mr. Moore, you have a stomach ulcer that has broken open and is bleeding internally, and we are going to have to do emergency surgery tonight." I told him "do whatever you have to do, just get me out of this pain."

I was 25 at the time and up to that point I had only had one prior surgery, and that was the removal of my tonsils when I was in middle school. I had forgotten all that surgery entails. I remember the operating room and how sanitary everything was. I also remember the surgeon, the anesthesiologist, and a nurse. I remember asking one or all of them if the surgery was going to hurt. They said no you won't feel a thing, and the pain that you have now will change to soreness when you come out of here. My life was now in their hands, I didn't know if I would wake up back in Cookeville, Tennessee or if I might wake up in Paradise. Either way I made sure to say a private prayer in the midst of the pain, asking for forgiveness of anything I might have done, just in case.

By this time you know everything went great. The surgeon said I was going to make a full recovery, but I would have to spend the next few days in the hospital. I don't know which was worse, the surgery or the hospital stay. From Friday to the following Tuesday I was confined to a hospital bed with one TV and nothing to eat or drink. The operating room staff was right when they said that my pain would go away. I was really sore, but I didn't mind. They attached a morphine pump to my bed and everybody that came in was shocked I had never once used it. The soreness was nothing compared to the pain that I had. My days consisted of watching TV and counting the hours. I remember saying to myself and anyone else who would listen, "I'd do anything to get out of here." That following Tuesday I was finally discharged and was sent home. I had a strict diet of soft foods and water. I also couldn't lift anything over ten pounds, and worst of all (to me at least) I couldn't preach or drive the church bus. As much as I fought my mom, our church clerk at Chestnut Mound, and the folks at Willow Avenue, I knew I was going to have to "ride the pine" for awhile. In my time away from doing these things, I realized how much I cherish them. Getting up and preaching and getting behind the wheel of the bus are a privilege. One in which I could have easily lost.

My nightly pain in my legs and feet continued on until that following Summer when I was referred to a wonderful rheumatologist at Vanderbilt. He said my pain stems from my fours years of playing high school football. He has prescribed me some safe medication that I still take. My neurologist, also at Vanderbilt, has ruled out seizure activity and both of these doctors have given me a clean bill of health. So what has all this taught me?

1. Life is a vapor. In James 4:14, we are told "You do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away." Friends, we are not guaranteed any time here on this Earth. We live on borrowed time. Prior to January 25, 2018, I didn't fully grasp this. I lived day to day "flying by the seat of my pants." My day was determined based on how Vanderbilt football, men's basketball, baseball, and Atlanta Braves baseball did on a particular day. I didn't value my preaching at Chestnut Mound, and it embarrasses me to say this, but I treated it as just another source of income. Likewise, I considered driving the bus at Willow Avenue   just an opportunity to have my name printed in the bulletin next to the cute clipart picture of a bus. But when these things were taken away from me, I realized how much they mean and still do to me. I knew they were a gift from God and it was (and still is) my job to do everything I can to protect these gifts.

2. Tell those closest to you how much you love them. I have always told my family and friends how much I love them either by my words or my actions, but before my health issues I wasn't intentional about it, meaning I never went out of my way to tell them or show them how much I loved them. I didn't really grasp how serious my surgery was until the surgeon came in my room one afternoon and basically told me that if I hadn't begun to feel that excruciating pain, than I would have bled out and died. Are we intentional about telling our family and friends how much we love them? At the end of my sermons I always try to tell the congregation at Chestnut Mound how much I love them. In John 15:12, Jesus commands that we "love one another as I have loved you." Likewise we should never fail to tell God who much we love Him and appreciate how much He does for us. Our relationship with Him is the closest relationship that we can have with anyone. In Matthew 22:37, Jesus commands us "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind." Friends just like I said earlier, we are on borrowed time. Make the most of your life here on this Earth.

3. When bad things happen to you, determine to use them for good. Before my health issues, I didn't realize how much of an impact my preaching can have on people. In May, I will have been at Chestnut Mound for three years. In those three years I have seen so much growth in those people. They are so interested in the Gospel, Evangelism, and being an example in the community. What if I had never had those health issues. Would I still just be going through the motions like before? Could it be by the providence of God that he saw that I have a talent to preach and was not utilizing my talent, so he decided he'd wake me up? What about the Willow Avenue bus ministry? Could He have seen that I needed to connect with our riders on a more personal and Spiritual level, offering them encouragement? What about spending more time with my family and friends? I find since my surgery that we go to more Vanderbilt games, and try to make it an annual Summer trip to go to an Atlanta Braves game. With my friends, I try to go to lunch with them or go and visit them. I go fishing as much as I can with one of my good buddies. I'm a lucky guy, and by the Providence of God I can love my family and friends, preach, and drive the church bus better and with more appreciation and purpose than I ever could before!!

It is by happenstance that the last time Brother Blackwell held a gospel meeting at Willow Avenue, I was laid up in the hospital. About a year later he had his accident. Most people would have sulked around and wanted pity, but not him. He uses his accident for good. Likewise my journey with my health has influenced me for good and drives me everyday to get up and save souls. I truly believe in the Providence of God. Sometimes we all need something to happen that wakes us up. I wouldn't wish my situation on anyone, but I do know that I'm a better (no not perfect) person because of it. Friends I love you, the Chestnut Mound church of Christ loves you, and most importantly God loves you.

In Him,

Carver Moore

We would be honored for you to join us for worship at the Chestnut Mound church of Christ.

Our service times are as follows:

Sunday Morning Bible study: 10 am

Sunday morning worship: 11 am

Sunday evening worship: 5 pm